Your Cute Texts!

Anonymous asked: My boyfriend left for BMT and we've been discussing marriage. We have plans to get married next summer after I finish this year of college. We've already made it clear that I will finish my degree even if we get married now. I guess what I'm trying to ask is in your opinion should we wait it out till I finish college here? Or would it be stupid in your opinion to get married now?

The decision is first and foremost, your own but I will give you my opinion since you asked for it. Marriage, to me, is a really, really big deal so I don’t think that it should ever be rushed. If you’re in love then that’s fantastic but you don’t need to run off and get married in the next 5 minutes to prove it. I don’t think it’s stupid to get married now or tomorrow or whenever, but I do think you should really think about it. Don’t you think something like a wedding and marriage would distract you from your studies? What happens if you get pregnant and can’t finish college? Do you want to have an established career or good job before you focus on starting a family? If you and your boyfriend really love each other then it wont hurt either of you to wait just a little bit longer, but if you think that getting married would be really good for you, then do it! Go with your gut feeling but just make sure you weigh out all your options.

Best of luck with everything :) xx

Anonymous asked: ok so ive been with this guy for way over a year now and im happily in love with him. but there is a problem. his dad is dating my mom. we got alot of shit for it when we first started dating and we just kind of ignored it. but im afriad that if our parents get to serious then we wont be able to get married or have kids or any of the plans that we have. im so sorry if this is weird. help please?

Okay well, I’m just gonna be honest here and say I’ve never heard of something like this so I don’t really know what…or how to help you but please don’t be sorry for pointless things! You can’t help who you fall in love with :)

Anyways, as for your problem, I don’t think that your parents getting serious should affect you and your boyfriend’s relationship. I mean, if they get married, technically you will be STEP brother and sister, but I wouldn’t really say there’s something wrong with that since you’re not blood related or anything weird like that. And also you were together before your parents decided to get married (if they do) so it’s not like you started dating when you were already brother and sister……. I don’t know I guess it’d probably be weird to some people but I don’t see anything wrong with it.. Just take each day as it comes and see how it goes. I think it’s probably worth talking to both of your parents about your concerns as well if you can and just see how they feel about it.

Good luck, lovely :) xx

Anonymous asked: 1/2* Right. im 18 and my boyfriend Dan is 20. he has a 3 bedroomed house and a stable job as a chef. In February earlier this year, he proposed to me (i said yes) but we've agreed to get married after im 21. In April this year, he said he wanted us to try for a baby. Ive always said that im not going to have one until im over 20 with a proper job, so i told him that it was something huge and i would have to think about it. i told him no but he started aurguing with me saying that he had a 3

(Continued….) bedroomed house and a good job with good money. He also said that he would take time off work to look after the baby whilst i found a good job. i kind of agree with some off what he is saying, but i still dont no weather i am ready to have a baby yet. This whole thing is causing more arguments between us and im afraid that it will drive us apart. Dans dad is moving to Australia in 5 months and that’s the only thing he wants to tell him before he goes: hes expecting a baby. what should i do? x
_________________________________

NEVER let anyone force you into doing anything you don’t feel comfortable with. And your fiancee telling you that you have to have a child is one of them. Do you understand how huge that is? You’re 18 years old! You have your whole life ahead of you to have a baby. Do you want to be tied down with that kind of commitment at 18? If your fiancee loves you as much as he claims to, then why cant he wait until you are ready to have a baby? Why would he want to force something like that on you? Just because he has a stable job and is in a career that he loves, what gives him the right to tell you what to do? What, cause he has a career, you don’t need one? All you’re supposed to do is pop out kids when he tells you to? That is ridiculous.

I’m sorry if this offends you or if I’m being rude but I really, really disagree with your boyfriend’s mentality. Why should he get to take time off with the baby while you look for a job? I’m sure that after having a baby, your priority would not be to get a job, especially since he has such a good one. I mean it’s fantastic that he can support himself and you and has his own house and can afford that kind of lifestyle at the age of 20 but if you are not ready then do not do it.

You will obviously not end up regretting having a child, but it’s possible that you will regret having one so young. I assume you live in America or something of the sort where the legal age to drink and go to clubs etc is 21. Do you want to have a baby right now? Or do you want to enjoy your life, being young and doing whatever the hell you want without having to worry about a baby? Honestly, I know it sounds like I’m against this, probably because I am, and maybe someone else will have a different perspective but, I just don’t see why he is forcing you and arguing with you about something that ultimately you have the decision to make.

All I will say now is this. If you are not ready, do not let him force you into it. If he wont stop trying to force you then you need to give him an ultimatum and say “I want to be married before I have a child and I want to be ready. If you can’t be supportive of that and of me, then maybe you don’t deserve to be with me.”

I’m sure Dan’s dad would prefer it if his son didn’t say “hey dad, I know you’re leaving but guess what - you’re gonna have to come all the way back here pretty much as soon as you step foot in Australia because we’re having a baby!” You know? Do you see where I’m coming from? I’m sure that Dan’s dad would also appreciate his son enjoying his time with you and his life being young rather than being tied down with a baby. Also, a baby will tie you to Dan’s life, pretty much forever. I know you said yes when he proposed but you have to think about if you’re ready for that kind of commitment too. A baby is very, very, very expensive. Even if Dan makes good money, it usually takes combined wages to successfully support a family home, two people and a baby. (usually, but not always obviously.)

You can ignore everything I’ve said and do whatever the hell you want cause it’s your decision and yours only. Not Dan’s, not your parents, not his parents, not your friends. Yours. And you need to make it. Maybe me being so full on against this will make you realise that you do want to have a baby… Who knows. But I wish you all the best with whatever happens :) xxxxx

Anonymous asked: I've been dating my boyfriend for about three years now, and he proposed to me. As much as i like him, I'm nineteen years old. He gave me the ring to think about it, what do i do!? Sometimes i think marrying him would be wonderful, and other times i think it would be the worst thing ever and we would be divorced before forty. Advice please!!

I’ve answered this message as soon as I saw it because I figure it’s kind of urgent that you get a reply.

Wow, a proposal? That is gigantic! The fact that you’re even having any doubts shows that you’re not ready. And I applaud you for not just saying “YES YES YES” in the moment. You have to really, really think about what it is that you want out of the relationship in the future and if he can give it to you. Nineteen years old is young to get married, but if you feel ready, there shouldn’t be any reason against it.

Is your boyfriend older than you? If he is, it’s possible that he’s experienced more than you have and knows that he wants to be with you forever, and is ready for it. Marrying him, if you love him, will be wonderful, but it will also be incredibly difficult. You cannot go into something like that thinking it will be easy breezy because it won’t be. Personally, I would never be able to marry someone who I haven’t lived with first. How do you know you’ll be able to live with someone for the rest of your life if you don’t give it a test run first?

You could suggest using the ring as a promise ring instead because you really want to be with him but you’re not ready for something like marriage just yet. You need to be 100% honest with him. If he loves you, there should be no rush to get married anyway. You can still love someone without being married. Maybe you could say yes to being engaged but that you don’t even want to think about the wedding unless you feel ready.

Just make sure you don’t leave him hanging, always be honest with him and talk him through your feelings as you’re having them. Being distant from him will crush his feelings and make him have doubts about your feelings for him. Don’t ever feel pressured into something you’re not ready for though. You should try talking to people who are in your position or have been in your position.

If you message me with your Tumblr and not on anonymous, I’ll be able to give you some Tumblr’s of people who married young/have just been proposed to, by replying privately to you so that you can maybe ask them for advice if you like.

I’d like you to keep me posted if you wish. Let me know what happens. All the best with it though love. xx